Years ago, Charles Barkley took a lot of heat for saying that he wasn’t a role model. To paraphrase, he was talking about the fact that parents are the real role models, and people on TV, even athletes, aren’t the ones your kids should look up to. not only do I understand his point of view, I celebrate it.

I bring this up today because someone called me their role model recently. I’ve been stewing over that for a minute, not exactly sure how to take it. I know that it was a compliment, but I am unsure how I feel about being someone’s role model. I even had to look up the definition; according to Dictionary.com, a role model is “a person whose behavior, example or success is or can be emulated by others”. I don’t know… maybe it’s me, but I’m a little uncomfortable with this.

I know I can be entertaining on here and with my writings on other sites, but this shit is hard and not at all pretty. I have come to realizations and a peace with my eating, but it is a daily struggle to stay on the path. I know where I’ve been and what I still have to go through. I can see where I have fallen down and where I still have issues to work on… and we still have quite a bit to go until I get to the end. This is what I think about when I read the definition of role model, as I don’t think my “behavior” or “example” is one to emulate. Behavior especially… look at how much I swear! I’m loud, pissy and judgmental! Being in my own skin and looking at a situation from the inside out and not from the outside in, I wouldn’t wish my experience on anyone else. LOL!

But who am I to say who’s a good role model? If someone looks at my experiences and gains the confidence to deal with their own weight issues because of it, what am I supposed to say to that? Am I going to say, “uh, you got it wrong, sister…look someplace else!” just because I’m uncomfortable? That’s not only foolish of me, that’s downright selfish.

I need to be at peace with the fact that this experience is one that people will watch. Hell, they may even gather a smidgen of inspiration from it. If that is the case, and along the way they can find that motivation and inspiration within themselves to feel all bad-ass and unstoppable, I’m good with that.

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